My Freedom Is Not Like Yours | #PTSDchat
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My Freedom Is Not Like Yours

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What does freedom look like to you?

To some it may be;

The mending of a broken heart,

Being cured from a disease.

The heavy weight of a jail cell opening.

Running past the finish line and falling to the ground.

Drinking refreshing clean water.

Escaping the pain of an abusive relationship.

Turning the ignition after getting your drivers licence.

Performing a play you have rehearsed for months.

Finally apologizing – and it being accepted.

Feeling the diploma placed in your hand.

Tasting the salt of the ocean for the first time.

Holding hands under the stars.

…all understandable.

Freedom to me is;

A quiet mind, free from feeling broken for a full minute.

Waking up to see the sun and actually wanting to feel it on my skin.

A night of dreams that I can’t remember.

When I finally run out of tears.

When the obsession to numb passes.

Walking Walter and not having to look over my shoulder.

Not seeing the pain in everyone’s smile.

Not feeling dark energy looming over the earth.

Being able to fool everyone that I am ok for one more day so that they don’t worry.

Having a day when I don’t learn of a suicide of a peer, and knowing exactly how that person must have felt.

Looking into Adam, Caroline, Walter, Pepsi and Loller’s eyes 🙂

Thinking that maybe…maybe…one day I can let someone in again.

Imagining living on a silent mountain and falling asleep in the grass.

Fearing death.

 

 

 

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